One night

So one night you meet a guy. He is handsome, smart, funny and seems to have a good head on his shoulders. You guys sit and talk over dinner and get to know about one another. You find out all the normal answers to the mundane questions like "What do you do?" "Where were you born?" and "whats your favorite movie?" But then as the night progresses you realize that your actually enjoying his company. You both take a walk to your car and neither wants to night to end. So you end up at his place. You talk about movies, and music and finally the thing of writing comes up. You ask him if he writes and he answers just academically. You ask if you can read something he wrote, and he opens up his laptop and looks. He then hands you an essay he wrote for a class. He says "since your an actress read it aloud". So you begin. It seems to be going well till you start to get to the heart of the essay, realizing that this essay has details in it that are extremely personal to him. You continue reading, aware that he has now realized that he has given an emmense amount of information to you about his past. After your done reading it, you look at him and say the words "You have a good heart." He looks back at you and says "Don't say that." Is it possible you are the one person who makes him feel more like an actual person? People reading something that personal normally would run and hide. I don't run from that, I learn from it. As I sit here today writing a blog that I know only a few select will read. I can't help but think that I may have opened him up to something he has never expereinced. Part of me is terrified he will never call me again, the other side feels as though she had a night with a great guy who if he doesn't call at least she had a good night with a guy. Either way, the agony of waiting for a phone call, can feel like a lifetime.

Do what you love

"Do what you love" is a saying I have been struggling my whole life to figure out. My life revolves around the arts. I watch the academy awards in hopes that some day I will get one of those, I listen to music and envision what it would be like to be on stage in front of millions of people performing. So when someone says to me Do what you love. The arts is the only thing that comes to mind. Sure I want to be a teacher, but I would rather be in the arts for the love of it. I want to do something I love. It's time I did something about it and put myself out there.