The right move?

How do you know when you made a right decision? How do you know that you did the right thing? Your heart was saying yes, but your head was just terrified. You meet someone. There is an instant spark.. You feel as though you and this person have known each other for years. You seem to be getting along great and the sexual compatibility is all there. You think to yourself, good job. We are gonna work out, just take it slow and don't cling. Then comes Saturday night, where you resent the way you felt because for almost a entire week he has said nothing to you. You feel used and mistreated. You feel like why would I bother with all the mushy stuff with this person if it wasn't going to work out? Why hasn't he called or texted? The real answer is I don't know. Lots of people get wrapped up into their own lives that it makes it almost impossible to have time for another. I either really gauged it wrong, or misread how he was feeling. There may still be hope, but there is just something off. I guess I just have to move on and work through it. Maybe he will come around, maybe not. Sigh* Finding a mate sucks sometimes. :(

Size of a woman's pants...

We all stress over it, we all hate the size that we are. We hate hips, legs, thighs, big noses anything to make ourselves feel like we aren't good enough. All because the television shows every celebrity as a skinny twig. You have to look like Barbie to make it. I will let you in on a little secret women. MEN LOVE CURVES! They don't want skinny rails with nothing to hold onto. If your a size 12 you are the average size in America of a woman. You can be the skinniest thing in the world with a horrible personality and a plus size girl with a amazing personality. Trust me, men like the ones with the cushion. If you wanna lose weight then do it. I want to lose some weight, but certainly not the curve of my body. I like my curve, I have learned to embrace it and its something that took me a long time to get over. Trust me, I curse my hips when I try to find some jeans to wear because they hardly ever fit right, but at the end of the day I still love them. Who would want to have sex with a skeleton? Bottom line: Love your body, and if you wanna lose weight find a partner to do it with and stick to it, but remember your beautiful no matter what size you are. :)


Reen

Poem

All the years of searching
All the tears that shed
The moments been ticking by
Are you still far ahead?

Fighting for survival
Planning out your life
Finding the one for you
Out does any price

You knocked me off my feet
Floating on clouds of endless lust
Daydreaming of the moment
You chip away the dust

Distance creates a bond
A yearning fighting chance
to prove to one another
you will fight for the romance

My heart grows fonder
Of all you say and do
So simply said and done
I wrote a poem for you.

This poem was written for someone very special to me.

How to tell someone how you feel..

How do you tell someone how you truly feel without scaring them? Well I wrote a poem recently for my boyfriend. He seemed to really like it, which is good, but I feel as though it only glazed over how I really feel. How many of us stifle the urge to say something to someone that we know may scare them away? The 3 scariest words in the world to some people are "I Love You" Those three words are so powerful that if you ever notice in a movie, someone is about to die they always say I love you so and so. People get all choked up and worked up about these three words. When most people don't even use those words in the right context. They don't fully understand that once those words come out of your mouth to your boyfriend/girlfriend etc.. That you can't take them back. Your telling them that your in this for the long hall and that you love them. You don't go out and cheat on them after the I love you's have been thrown. People do it though. I love you is a powerful word. Use it carefully and wisely. Its not a tool to get laid. REMEMBER THAT!



~Reen

Distance makes the heart grow fonder... True or False?

In the depths of a relationship that has just begin to blossom, do the words, distance makes the heart grow fonder really have truth to them? You don't spend enough time with the person.. You see them once a month if your lucky, but can you fall in love with someone who lives that far away? Can you know them with certainty and know how they live if you don't see them all the time. Long distance relationships are difficult. Nobody can argue with you on that. The constant lack of them being with you, can burn a hole into you that makes it hard to breathe.. What about those couples and you know who you are, who are with each other 24/7 with no distance. Does that make their relationship any stronger then the long distance relationship. The answer to that question would be no. Just because someone is right next to you all the time, doesn't mean the relationship is any better. Sure you have the proximity of that person, but the connection between the two of you has to have the 3 parts of the triangle. Emotional, Mental and Physical. I have written numerous times about that triangle and I believe very highly in it. So to answer the true or false question, I think it depends on the couple. As you get to know someone you learn their secrets even when your not together all the time. You learn what makes them tick, what makes them happy, what their favorite beer might be. You can have a successful relationship with someone who lives far away. You just really gotta trust one another and trust that you can do it. Cherish the moments you get when they are with you. It seems to me the memories might be a little more memorable when you only get a certain amount of time with them. That's just my opinion though.. You can make up your own mind.


~Reen

Apologies for not writing...

I have been out of the loop of writing for a little bit. I apologize to my loyal readers.

    What constitutes cheating? Is it a mystical moment of weakness? Is it a desperate attempt at attention? What are the rules of cheating if there are rules? If you are in a long distance relationship, does that change the rules? So many factors are included in long distance relationships. You never see one another, you never get the chance for intimacy, and then what happens when the idea of moving comes into play? You move all that way to live with someone you only get to see once a month.You get there and suddenly you realize you know nothing about this person. You have seen them 12 times in the last year. I am not saying that long distance relationships can't work, it's just they bring up a set of questions that maybe wouldn't normally come up. For example, if you go to a party and someone is interested, do you flirt? do you tell them your in a committed relationship? What do you do? I have a very good friend who is torn between two guys. Both guys live quite a ways from her. One 5 hours away and the other at least a day away in travel. She likes both men, she cares for both men, she has spent time with both men and she can't decide who she wants to be with. So she decided to be with both. Does this mean she is cheating? It's long distance and she see's them rarely. She is emotionally committed to both, but she asks me the question, am I a bad person for doing that? Am I a cheater? I honestly didn't know what to say to respond to her. I guess it's considered cheating, but when someone is so far away... what constitutes cheating? I'm not quite sure I even know the answer to that question. I am with someone right now who I care deeply for. He lives quite a ways away, but we try to make it work.. I guess in the end, you decide your own rules of cheating.. in the end it's you who has to live with the consequences.

~Reen

The triangle of 3

So in all relationships the common mistake people make is to try to make the relationship something it's not. They don't accept the other person for the person they are and they end up breaking it off because they cant deal that their boyfriend/girlfriend isn't perfect. No one is perfect. I know that better then most. The minute that someone looks perfect is when you have put them into a fantasy world. I believe to have a successful and healthy relationship you need the 3 parts of the triangle. The Emotional, the Mental and the Physical Connections. All 3 of those and your relationship should be smooth sailing. Not meaning you won't have fights, it just means that the commitment will be deeper then maybe a fling you once had. I can say with true sincerity that I have found someone who has given me the triangle. The Emotional is a part of a relationship that I think lacks the most. An emotional connection is one of the most important. It's how you feel about the other person. It's not being afraid to tell someone how you truly feel. It's a communication between 2 people. The mental is important because you want to make sure that your mentally on the same page. You want to make sure that they understand things the way you do and that you are both equally as smart as the other. Ever been on a date with someone who makes you feel stupid because they seem so much more intelligent then you? It sucks. And the 3rd one is physical. A lot of times this one is used in ways it shouldn't be. Physical does not mean emotion. It can if you have the emotion already in place, but having sex with someone does not make you closer if you haven't established something with them before you bring the physical in. From experience, its much better if you wait till the emotional and mental connection is there before you go rushing into the physical. Trust me. It's worth the wait.

One night

So one night you meet a guy. He is handsome, smart, funny and seems to have a good head on his shoulders. You guys sit and talk over dinner and get to know about one another. You find out all the normal answers to the mundane questions like "What do you do?" "Where were you born?" and "whats your favorite movie?" But then as the night progresses you realize that your actually enjoying his company. You both take a walk to your car and neither wants to night to end. So you end up at his place. You talk about movies, and music and finally the thing of writing comes up. You ask him if he writes and he answers just academically. You ask if you can read something he wrote, and he opens up his laptop and looks. He then hands you an essay he wrote for a class. He says "since your an actress read it aloud". So you begin. It seems to be going well till you start to get to the heart of the essay, realizing that this essay has details in it that are extremely personal to him. You continue reading, aware that he has now realized that he has given an emmense amount of information to you about his past. After your done reading it, you look at him and say the words "You have a good heart." He looks back at you and says "Don't say that." Is it possible you are the one person who makes him feel more like an actual person? People reading something that personal normally would run and hide. I don't run from that, I learn from it. As I sit here today writing a blog that I know only a few select will read. I can't help but think that I may have opened him up to something he has never expereinced. Part of me is terrified he will never call me again, the other side feels as though she had a night with a great guy who if he doesn't call at least she had a good night with a guy. Either way, the agony of waiting for a phone call, can feel like a lifetime.

Do what you love

"Do what you love" is a saying I have been struggling my whole life to figure out. My life revolves around the arts. I watch the academy awards in hopes that some day I will get one of those, I listen to music and envision what it would be like to be on stage in front of millions of people performing. So when someone says to me Do what you love. The arts is the only thing that comes to mind. Sure I want to be a teacher, but I would rather be in the arts for the love of it. I want to do something I love. It's time I did something about it and put myself out there.

Cell Phones

Since when has it been ok for someone to go through your cell phone without permission? To wait until your sleeping, and then go through your cell phone and get all pissed off when they see something they don't like. First off, it's not their property. Second of all, they should not have any reason to not trust you, because the minute they start going through your phone without your knowledge, is the minute they started not trusting you. It really frustrates me when people do that. It happened to be a few days ago. I had been dating this guy for about a month or so and we felt the time had come for us to spend the night together. He didn't exactly live close to me, so the opportunity arose. Anyhow, so the second night he is here, I roll over to go to bed and about 20 min of trying to go to bed and bam he is slamming doors and getting all pissed off. I turn over and ask what is going on, he replys "Why don't you ask Matt?" I am quite dazed as to exactly what he is talking about, until it hits me. He went through my phone while I was sleeping. Instantly it turns into a fight and lets just say the dating between us stopped. I refuse to be with someone who doesn't trust me, plus thats a complete control freak as well. Well goodbye to him, but seriously girls... Who the fuck does he think he is? It's like going through a woman's purse. It's a major No NO!

Been a while..

I apologize in advance for my absence for the past few months. Life can get hectic when you have school and finals and things of that nature. The most recent thing that happened to me is that I had a revelation the other night. I was sitting in my room, listening to Josh Groban and his song "Per Te" and it came into my mind that I loved this song, but had no idea what the song was about. I decided to google it, and after I did so, I realized that I liked the song even better after knowing the words. I also came to the realization that songs that are sung in different languages sometimes have more powerful lyrics then ones in English. For example in an English song you might hear "Oh baby, I love you so much" versus in an Italian song you would translate the song into "You are my everything, I am nothing without you, you are my soul and reason for existence" Which one would you want your love to dedicate to you? I'm thinking the Italian one. lol